Ranging from 1 minute to possibly all night long, just how long should sex last? Is there an “ideal” period of time?
It’s been a long argued topic; how long should sex last? Today’s society has implanted a false interpretation of what good sex is – a man should be at least six inches, sex should last for the entire night, women need to be freaks in bed – it’s all but a fantasy that is far from reality.
What makes good sex depends on you. Sure, there’s a general idea of what good sex should be like or how long it should last, but that doesn’t make it ‘correct’. But is it scientifically backed?
According to Science.
There was a study done by Penn State Erie researchers (Eric Corty and Jenay Guadriani) surveying 50 members of the Society for Sex Therapy and Research. The community consisted of people from psychologists to nurses who have seen thousands of patients.
They did the study by calculating the amount of time spent during sex, and then rating what they considered good enough, great, too short, or too long. It’s important to note that the sexual intercourse meant here is from the penetration of the vagina by the penis. So foreplay doesn’t count.
According to the study, 68% of the participants found sexual intercourse that lasted from 1-3 minutes “too short”, 3-7 minutes “adequate”, 7-13 minutes “desirable”, and 13-30 minutes “too long”.
“With this survey, we hope to dispel such fantasies and encourage men and women with realistic data about acceptable sexual intercourse, thus preventing sexual disappointments and dysfunctions.” Said Eric Corty, associate professor of psychology.
So there you go. According to survey, desirable sex should last from 7-13 minutes.
According to Society.
Like we mentioned, society has planted an image of what sex should be, how long it should last, and how it should feel. There’s a distorted perception of sex that’s being implanted in younger generation’s minds, and that’s because it’s not talked about enough. Talking about sex, may it be sexual health, sex workers, anything related to it is taboo.
See also our post about sex positivity: How To Be Sex Positive: 10 Things You Need To Know
What we (DOWN) want to do is to create a safe space for everyone to say what they want. It’s not embarrassing to say you want to have sex with someone as long as you do it respectfully, and there shouldn’t be any shaming if you’ve had bad sex. Bad sex happens all the time, it’s not that common, but it does happen.
We all know once we’ve had bad sex, generally, we tend to not want to see that person again. That’s also completely fine, but what’s not OK is if we mock someone because of it. Joking in good fun is acceptable, but we need to know the line.
Sex is often seen as wrong, dirty, barbaric even to some. And we are in a society where everything is growing more progressive, but perhaps we need to also reassess that progressiveness.