Whether or not you have a boyfriend, you should know these red flags in men and be careful! Sometimes you don’t really see it coming.
It doesn’t matter if you have a boyfriend or not to read this post. Everyone should know that there are red flags in men – in fact, there are red flags in anybody. Everyone has different red flags, but sometimes those red flags can be generic. And this is just a precaution so that you can immediately identify that red flag when meeting someone.
20 Red Flags in Men
This happens when he only wants to spend time with you and only you, and he also doesn’t allow you to spend time with anybody else. He won’t be happy when you decide to spend time with friends or family over him, and he expects you to be in his service 24/7.
Usually in a relationship, both people can make plans for a date. But those who have this red flag would only want to do the things they want to do and they’re never on board with what you want. If they don’t get their way, they’d probably be mad at you or threaten to leave you.
- You’re never good enough for him
He thinks that you’re not good enough for him, but he wouldn’t say it. He’d always mask his true intentions by saying “I want what’s best for you” or “I’m only doing this because I love you and I care about you”. Which is a complete lie. The truth is he doesn’t like you for who you are, but he can’t find someone else who’d accept him, which is why he’s trying to change you. Ironic, no?
- Snooping around
Nobody wants a boyfriend or anyone snooping aroun their phone looking for… whatever they’re looking for. It’s a breach of privacy, and no one should do it – or even have the thought of it. It’s not cool, and it’s creepy.
If he constantly makes you feel intimidated, insecure, hate yourself, or guilty, then you’re in a controlling relationship. It’s a form of abuse, though it may not look like it. It’s unhealthy for your mind and body, so please recognize the signs and get yourself out of that relationship ASAP.
5/20 Red Flags in Men
- He hits you
I think this one is quite obvious. It’s NEVER okay to hit your partner – or anyone. If he ever gets violent with you, raises his hand, or touches you in a way that made you scared, please know that you’re not alone. Many people go through this, and have reached out for help. You can, too! You can visit hotline.org for help, or you can take it step by step by telling friends or family.
- Straight up rude
If he’s rude to waiters, service workers, random people, his mom, or even anyone for no reason at all, it’s not worth it. It means he’s short-tempered, impatient, and probably has anger management issues. Please don’t go into the relationship thinking that you can fix his short fuse, it’ll just stress you out and introduce you to bigger problems that are not yours.
7/20 Red Flags in Men
- Constant self-hate
There’s a difference between thinking that you’re not the best version of yourself and constantly announcing to the world how terrible of a person you are, what you hate about yourself, and the problems he’s having just to get positive feedback. For example, he accidentally breaks a mug and he goes on to scold and insult himself, and the only way to calm him down is by telling him how important he is to you, how much you love him, that what he’s saying is not true, etc. It’s exhausting.
- He never stops texting
I understand those people who text a lot, the people who share about their lives, but sometimes it can be too much. Sometimes it’s important to spend some alone time without sharing what happened in your life – plus what would you talk about afterwards? If he keeps suffocating you with texts, maybe it’s time to tell him. There’s a chance he might take it better than expected.
- He demands you to reply fast
The texting part on its own is suffocating enough, but if he keeps spamming you and demands you to reply every 5 minutes, it’s a red flag. You have your own life, you know. Your job isn’t to answer his text messages.
10/20 Red Flags in Men
- He’s a man-child (The Peter Pan)
Some men are stuck in the past, they refuse to grow up and out of their bad habits as a child. If he says he needs you, just remember that you’re not his mom, nurse, or maid.
- The trash talker
Everyone has had an ex at one point (unless this is your first relationship), and if he constantly talks bad about his ex and can’t move on from it, then he hasn’t truly moved on. The relationship is in the past, so he evidently should let it go. Imagine what he’d say about you if you guys broke up.
- The Untouchable
When I say he’s untouchable, I mean he thinks he’s never wrong, he thinks he’s always a good person, he’s never done anything wrong nor can he ever. He will never take the blame for anything, and you’ll be blamed for everything.
- Constantly asks for reassurance
Similar to constant self-hate, he constantly asks you to tell him you’ll never leave him, that you’ll always be by his side no matter what, and that it’s him and you against the world. Don’t promise him such things because he will hold it against you.
14/20 Red Flags in Men
- Constantly accusing you
Here’s what this one looks like. He trips over his socks; he’ll blame you for not picking up his laundry. He sees you’re often busy; he’ll accuse you of cheating. He sees the house dirty, he’ll accuse you of not taking care of it.
- They expect you to read their mind
There’s nothing more annoying than dropping hints. Those “I’m really tired, I think I need to go get a massage” when it turns out they want you to offer him a massage. But when you don’t offer he’ll get mad, and so you then offer – but he doesn’t want it anymore because you’re only doing it because he told you to. Sound familiar, ladies?
- Crippling thirst for attention
He can never leave you alone even for a minute. He’s constantly texting you, poking you, calling you – his excuse would be he wants to make sure you’re okay, when really he’s keeping his eye on you and doesn’t trust you to be on your own.
- They comment about how you look
Do I really need to explain this one? Unless it’s a genuine question, every guy should know how to say ‘you look beautiful’ especially when you have such an exciting look when showing off your new.. dress, hair, shoes, anything.
- Makes you believe your opinions are wrong all the time
It’s called gaslighting. Let’s say there’s a grape, and you say it’s a grape, but he’s telling you it’s an apple. You know it’s a grape, but he makes you think you’re so ridiculous to even think that it’s a grape. Here’s a video that explains it.
He thinks your thoughts are ridiculous, and he expresses it in a belittling way that makes you intimidated. You feel small when you’re around him and you feel like you can’t speak up because he’ll only belittle you.
And that is 20/20 Red flags in men. Not everyone has all of these, and maybe someone doesn’t have any of these at all. But it can’t hurt to be on your guard.